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A screenshot of the cast of 'The Expendables 3' from the teaser trailer.

A screenshot of the cast of The Expendables 3 from the teaser trailer.

Where do I begin with The Expendables? I didn’t see the first two films because they just didn’t appeal to me. Sure, there were plenty of recognizable 80’s action stars in the first film, some more modern action stars in the second, news of an all-female ExpendaBelles spinoff, and now a third Expendables film with an even larger cast is being readied for a 2014 release. Without further ado … here’s the first teaser.

Apart from the slightly amped-up take on the “Colonel Bogey March”, the Expendables 3 teaser does nothing for me. There’s no hint of the plot, just assembling the cast of characters (thanks to CGI and green-screen). I’m not eagerly anticipating over-the-top action sequences and explosions, bad dialogue, and over-the-hill action stars who are somehow still raking in the big bucks doing what they do best. Then again, 80’s action films (and professional wrestlers and MMA fighters) aren’t quite my cup of tea.

The Expendables 3 stars Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Wesley Snipes, Antonio Banderas (Did the team need Zorro’s sword-fighting skills? What ever happened to not bringing a knife/sword to a gun fight?), Dolph Lundgren, Harrison Ford, Kellen Lutz, Terry Crews, Robert Davi, Kelsey Grammer (Frasier? In a glorified action movie? There had better be a good reason.), Randy Couture, Ronda Rousey, and Mel Gibson as the Expendables and their antagonists. Well, Mel is the head antagonist, and I would venture to guess that all the returning cast members are on the team, and the newer cast members are minor/auxiliary characters. The Expendables 3 is directed by Patrick Hughes based on a screenplay from Katrin Benedikt, Dave Callaham, Creighton Rothenberger, and Sylvester Stallone, and it hits theaters on August 15, 2014.


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